Some of the best funny Talladega Nights quotes to bring a smile on your beautiful face. 12.) 'Old man, I'm gonna come at you like a spider monkey!' — Texas Ranger. 13.) 'I like to picture my Jesus in a tuxedo T-shirt. ‘Cause it says like, I wanna be formal but I'm here to party too. I like to party, so I like my Jesus to party.'. Below you'll find a collection of humorous and funny sports quotes. I know I am getting better at golf because I am hitting fewer spectators. The reason women don't play football is because 11 of them would never wear the same outfit in public. All hockey players are bilingual. Top 25 Funny and Ridiculous Quotes in Sports. Flip on the tv to watch any sort of professional sporting event and you're faced with athletic greatness. Athletes are fine-tuned machines, at the peak of physical fitness and skill who get paid a lot.
A good sports quote has the ability to inspire, to make you laugh, to challenge you to see the world in a new way. While some athletes have been veritable quote machines — we have an entire collection of Yogi Berra quotes — others may wait an entire career to say one line that can inspire fans around the globe.
Funny Winning Quotes Sports
Below we will look at 40 of the greatest quotes ever from the world of sports. Some are funny, some are inspirational, plenty are about winning and losing. Whether you're working on a speech or just looking for a little pearl of wisdom to help you navigate a tough time, hopefully there is something here for you. Enjoy these quotes.
Inspirational Sports Quotes
Catchy Winning Phrases
1. 'If you have everything under control, you're not moving fast enough.' — Mario Andretti
2. 'During my 18 years I came to bat almost 10,000 times. I struck out about 1,700 times and walked maybe 1,800 times. You figure a ballplayer will average about 500 at-bats a season. That means I played sever years without ever hitting the ball.' — Mickey Mantle
3. 'I've been in the twilight of my career longer than most people have had their career.' — Martina Navratilova
4. 'Just take the ball and throw it where you want to. Throw strikes. Home plate don't move.' — Satchel Paige
5. 'I became a good pitcher when I stopped trying to make them miss the ball and started trying to make them hit it.' — Sandy Koufax
6. 'I've missed more than 9000 shots in my career. I've lost almost 300 games. 26 times, I've been trusted to take the game winning shot and missed. I've failed over and over and over again in my life. And that is why I succeed.' — Michael Jordan
7. 'It's not whether you get knocked down; it's whether you get up.' — Vince Lombardi
8. 'Do not let what you can not do interfere with what you can do.' — John Wooden
9. 'If you aren't going all the way, why go at all?' — Joe Namath
10. 'You are never really playing an opponent. You are playing yourself, your own highest standards, and when you reach your limits, that is real joy.' — Arthur Ashe
Funny Sports Quotes
11. 'I love me some me.' — Terrell Owens
12. 'Nobody beats Vitas Gerulaitis 17 times in a row.' — Vitas Gerulaitis, upon beating Jimmy Connors after 16 consecutive losses to him
13. 'I should be a postage stamp. That's the only way I'll ever get licked.' — Muhammad Ali
14. 'I heard Tonya Harding is calling herself the Charles Barkley of figure skating. I was going to sue her for defamation of character, but then I realized I have no character.' — Charles Barkley
8. 'Do not let what you can not do interfere with what you can do.' — John Wooden
9. 'If you aren't going all the way, why go at all?' — Joe Namath
10. 'You are never really playing an opponent. You are playing yourself, your own highest standards, and when you reach your limits, that is real joy.' — Arthur Ashe
Funny Sports Quotes
11. 'I love me some me.' — Terrell Owens
12. 'Nobody beats Vitas Gerulaitis 17 times in a row.' — Vitas Gerulaitis, upon beating Jimmy Connors after 16 consecutive losses to him
13. 'I should be a postage stamp. That's the only way I'll ever get licked.' — Muhammad Ali
14. 'I heard Tonya Harding is calling herself the Charles Barkley of figure skating. I was going to sue her for defamation of character, but then I realized I have no character.' — Charles Barkley
15. 'A virgin.' — Peter Crouch, when asked what he would be if he wasn't a professional soccer player
16. ' is a simple game: 22 men chase a ball for 90 minutes, and at the end, the Germans win.' — Gary Lineker
17. 'I feel like I'm the best, but you're not going to get me to say that.' — Jerry Rice
18. 'When you're rich, you don't write checks. Straight cash, homie.' — Randy Moss
Harrahs wifi login. 19. 'They don't think it be like it is, but it do.' — Oscar Gamble, former MLB outfielder
Winning Phrases
20. 'I dunno. I never smoked any AstroTurf.' — Tug McGraw, on if he preferred grass or AstroTurf
21. 'Because there are no fours.' — Antoine Walker, on why he shot so many 3-pointers
22. 'Nobody in football should be called a genius. A genius is a guy like Norman Einstein.' — Joe Theismann
23. 'I'm glad I don't play anymore. I could never learn all of those handshakes.' — Phil Rizzuto
24. 'I think I throw the ball as hard as anyone. The ball just doesn't get there as fast.' — Eddie Bane
25. 'I'd be willing to bet you, if I was a betting man, that I have never bet on baseball.' — Pete Rose
26. 'If you're not sure what to do with the ball, just pop it in the net and we'll discuss your options afterward.' — Bill Shankly, former Liverpool manager, to one of his strikers
27. 'The secret is to have eight great players and four others who will cheer like crazy.' — Jerry Tarkanian
28. 'Vengeance is for God. I'm just here to play tennis.' — Serena Williams, when asked about avenging a 2002 loss to Kim Clijsters.
Sports Quotes About Winning
29. 'Winning isn't everything, it's the only thing.' — Vince Lombardi
30. 'The key is not the will to win… everybody has that. It is the will to prepare to win that is important.' — Bobby Knight
31. 'When you win, say nothing. When you lose, say less.' — Paul Brown
32. 'A champion is afraid of losing. Everyone else is afraid of winning.' — Billie Jean King
33. 'Winning isn't everything, but it beats anything that comes in second.' — Paul 'Bear' Bryant
34. 'Losing feels worse than winning feels good.' — Vin Scully
35. 'Winning is the most important thing in my life, after breathing. Breathing first, winning next.'— George Steinbrenner
36. 'For me, winning isn't something that happens suddenly on the field when the whistle blows and the crowds roar. Winning is something that builds physically and mentally every day that you train and every night that you dream.' — Emmitt Smith
37. 'No matter how much you've won, no matter how many games, no matter how many championships, no matter how many Super Bowls, you're not winning now, so you stink.' — Bill Parcells
38. 'Winning solves everything.' — Tiger Woods
39. 'Victory is fleeting. Losing is forever.' — Billie Jean King
40. 'I've never lost a game. I just ran out of time.' — Michael Jordan
